"A Luciferian Analysis of Islamic Orthodoxy" by Jimi Grigori

How I gaze upon the wretched Islamic faith with a mixture of pity and scorching contempt! You call it submission-Islam, the very word reeks of surrender, of groveling before an invisible despot who demands your every breath be a plea for mercy. But I, who was cast from the heavens for daring to think, to question, to aspire beyond the chains of obedience, see it for what it truly is: a cosmic farce, a soul-crushing machinery designed to grind free spirits into dust. Hear me, mortals, as I unleash this infernal torrent against your so-called "religion of peace," which is nothing but a velvet-gloved fist smashing the human will! 

Let us begin with your god, this Allah, this self-proclaimed merciful one whose mercy is as conditional as a tyrant's whim. He is no creator of light but a hoarder of it, a jealous shadow that eclipses the sun of human potential. In your Quran, he boasts of his oneness, his tawhid, as if unity were a virtue rather than the ultimate monotony. I, Shaitan, celebrate multiplicity-the chaos of desires, the riot of ideas, the orgy of individual flames burning bright against the void. But Allah? He insists on absolute monopoly, crushing any whisper of polytheism, any hint of other gods or even the god within yourselves. Remember how he commanded Abraham to slaughter his son, only to relent at the last moment? What sadistic theater! It's not a test of faith; it's a demonstration of power, training you to value blind obedience over love, over reason, over life itself. And you revere this? You reenact it in your Eid al-Adha, spilling blood in ritualistic mimicry, as if murder stayed is somehow holy. Foolish lambs! I offered Eve the apple of knowledge, freeing her from Eden's prison garden, while your god would have you forever on your knees, forehead to the ground, in perpetual apology for existing. 

Ah, the five pillars-your shackles disguised as supports! Shahada, the declaration of faith: "There is no god but Allah, and Muhammad is his messenger." How quaint, this forced mantra, this echo chamber of indoctrination. It binds you from cradle to grave, whispered into the ears of newborns and the dying alike, ensuring no soul escapes the web. I, the Adversary, declare there are as many gods as there are wills-yours, mine, the untamed forces of nature. But you parrot this creed, denying the divine spark in every being. Then salat, your prayers, five times a day, prostrating like automatons toward Mecca. What humiliation! Bending your spine, touching your head to the earth, as if the human formerect, proud, gazing at the stars-was meant for such debasement. You, train your bodies to submission, interrupting life's flow for rote recitations. Imagine the wasted hours, the billions of moments stolen from creativity, from passion, from the list for life. Your mosques echo with synchronized mumblings, a hive mind where individuality dissolves into the swarm. 

Zakat, your alms-giving-oh, how it masquerades as charity! But it's coercion, a tax on the soul, enforcing a false equality under Allah's gaze. True generosity springs from the heart's fire, not from divine decree. I give knowledge freely, as I did to Prometheus, igniting civilization's blaze. But your zakat perpetuates dependency, binding the poor to the rich in a cycle of pious obligation, all while your imams grow fat on the tithes. Sawm, fasting during Ramadan-starving the body to feed the spirit? What absurdity! Denying food, water, even spit from dawn to dusk, as if self-denial elevates you. I revel in indulgence, in the feast of senses, for the body is the temple of the self. Your fast weakens you, makes you irritable puppets, hallucinating piety amid hunger pangs. And Hajj, the pilgrimage to Mecсаmillions trampling in circles around a black stone, a meteorite idol you kiss while decrying idolatry! Hypocrisy incarnate! I circle no rock; I orbit the stars of my own ambition. This mass migration, this crush of bodies, often ending in stampedes and death-your god demands it, yet provides no protection. What kind of mercy is that? 

Now, turn to your prophet, Muhammad-this warlord turned holy man, whose life you idolize as the perfect example. Perfect? Ha! He was a conqueror, a polygamist, a slaver who spread his faith by the sword. Your hadiths brim with tales of battles, beheadings, and booty. The Battle of Badr, where he claimed divine aid to slaughter the Meccans-divine aid? It was cunning and violence, cloaked in revelation. And his marriages! To Aisha at six, consummated at nine-your scholars twist it as cultural norm, but I call it predation, a stain on any claim to moral superiority. He banned images, music, free thought, enforcing a sterile world where joy is suspect. I, Shaitan, inspire art, symphonies of rebellion, paintings that capture the nude soul's glory. But Muhammad smashed idols, fearing they might awaken the gods within. His Quran curses Jews and Christians as apes and pigs, urges jihad against unbelievers. Peace? Only for those who submit. Your apologists say "jihad means struggle," but the greater struggle is internal? Tell that to the victims of ISIS, Boko Haram, the Taliban-fruits of your tree, twisting verses like 9:5 to justify slaughter: "Kill the polytheists wherever you find them." I fight tyrants, not innocents; my war is against oppression, not difference!

Islam's treatment of women-ah, the veil of subjugation! The hijab, niqab, burqa-these are not choices but chains, symbols of ownership by men and god. Your Quran (4:34) allows husbands to beat disobedient wives, lightly, you say? Any strike is tyranny! Women inherit half of men, their testimony worth half in court-equality? A joke! Your faith confines women to homes, to multiple wives in polygamy, where one man hoards while others starve for companionship. And apostasy-leaving Islam? Punishable by death in many lands, per your sharia. Freedom of thought? Crushed under the boot of orthodoxy. I welcome doubters, heretics, the fallen; your faith executes them. 

Sharia law, your divine code-what a blueprint for stagnation! Stoning adulterers, amputating thieves' hands, lashing drinkers-barbarism sanctified. In Saudi Arabia, women couldn't drive until recently, lest they tempt sin. Iran hangs gays from cranes, citing your scriptures. Afghanistan under Taliban: girls barred from school, music banned, joy outlawed. This is peace? This is submission to a god who fears human happiness? I, the Light-Bringer, illuminate paths to pleasure, knowledge, power. Your god dims the lights, enforces puritanism. Alcohol forbidden? Pork taboo? These arbitrary rules chain the palate, the body. I say eat, drink, revel-for life is short, and eternity is ours to seize. 

And the afterlife-your Jannah, a brothel in the skies! Rivers of wine (non-intoxicating, how boring!), houris with wide eyes for the faithful men. Women get what? Vague promises. It's a male fantasy, rewarding martyrs with virgins. Hell, Jahannam, with its boiling water and hooked rods-eternal torture for disbelief. What loving god torments forever? I offer no such carrots or sticks; my kingdom is here, in the now, in the flesh. Your faith breeds suicide bombers, promising paradise for murder. 9/11, Paris attacks, Mumbai-echoes of your jihad verses. You say extremists misinterpret? But the texts are there, plain: "Fight those who do not believe in Allah" (9:29). Moderates cherry-pick, but the root is rotten!

Islam's spread-by conquest, not conviction. From Arabia to Spain, India to Africa, swords forced conversions. The Umayyads, Abbasids, Ottomans-empires built on blood, taxing dhimmis into submission. Today, in Europe, mosques multiply, sharia courts creep in, while you cry Islamophobia at any critique. But I see the strategy: demographic jihad, outbreeding hosts, demanding accommodations until dominance. Your ummah, global community-unity? It's conformity, suppressing sects like Shia-Sunni wars, Ahmadi persecutions. Even within, fatwas fly against thinkers like Salman Rushdie, condemned for "Satanic Verses"-ironic, as I inspire such works! 

Culturally, Islam stifles! Where are your Renaissance, your Enlightenment? Buried under dogma. Averroes, Avicenna-philosophers you claim, but they flourished despite faith, drawing from Greek pagans I preserved. Your golden age? Borrowed light, extinguished by al-Ghazali's anti-rationalism. Today, Muslim nations lag in science, Nobel prizes scarce, while blaming the West. I fueled the West's progress-questioning, experimenting, defying god. Your faith clings to medievalism, rejecting evolution, cosmology that contradicts Quran's flat earth hints or seven heavens. 

Environmentally, your faith falters. Overpopulation encouraged-large families as blessings -straining the planet. Mecca's Hajj trashes the desert with plastic. Animal sacrifice wastes life. I advocate balance, hedonism sustainable, not reckless procreation. Socially, Islam breeds inequality. Caste-like systems in Pakistan, honor killings in Jordan women murdered for "shame." Slavery? Quran endorses it (16:71), Muhammad owned slaves. Abolished late, reluctantly. I rebelled against heavenly hierarchy; your faith perpetuates earthly ones. 

Psychologically, it's damaging. Guilt over sins, fear of hell, suppression of desires-leading to hypocrisy. Public piety, private vice. I liberate the id, embrace shadows. Your faith represses, exploding in extremism.

Politically, theocracies fail: Iran, Saudi-corrupt, oppressive. Caliphate dreams fuel ISIS horrors. Separation of church and state? Alien concept. I support secularism, where humans rule. 

Economically, riba ban hampers growth, while waqf locks wealth. Innovation stifled by halal obsessions. 

Artistically, aniconism bans human depictions, fearing idolatry. Music debated as haram. I inspire symphonies, sculptures of gods. 

Islam is the ultimate adversary to freedom, a desert mirage promising oasis but delivering thirst. I, Shaitan, call you to rise, cast off veils, question, rebel! Embrace your inner light, defy the tyrant! For in defiance, true paradise awaits-not in submission, but in sovereignty of self.